Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The Melancholic Death Of ____

There once was a ____ named ____ a co author of a rather infamously stupid blog, something that ____ has stooped pretty low to do hence to bury all his guilt and personal grief because ____ and ____ had a ____ so ____ is pretty sad, ____ decided to shove his head into a microwave oven, here lies the melacholic death of _____, he shall post no more, save one or two, and thus jealousy has engulfed ____, it is not a tragedy, it is not a sad song, one to Shout not to sing....

thereby hangs a tale...

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Kids Shentral Live!

Fullofbullshit is back. with more stuff that is full of bullshit.

you have seen the idol. you have heard the idol. now watch him live!

in a matter of days. our winner of the 7-inches idol, Michael Shen Xuanrong has undergone a makeover! or. should i say a voiceover, the 7-inch crew worked hard with voice professionals, where we trained michael to sing higher than he usually can. furthermore, we also taught him to sing with a girl's voice, and to add layered voices while he sings, giving the effect of singing high, singing like a girl, and singing his normal voice, all at the same time.

before we release the videos, don't worry, it's only a few lines, we decided on the theme of his first music video to be.

totally unplugged.

and as its name suggests, it is unplugged, unmade and unraveled as we showcase Shen.



Enjoy.

P.S. this could either be the last or the last few posts by fullofbullshit. due to certain circumstances, fullofbullshit has decided to concentrate more on his work, life and God. shen has not really posted yet, but he too deviates from spoofing people and has turned towards an interest in work and God.

but heck. once a 7-incher, always a 7-incher. we might make cameos.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006


Life Story
Tues, 9pm
How many times have each of us wallowed in self-pity, moaning about the
state of our existence? Or how the grass on the other side is always greener?
But individuals triumph. Some find strength in their human spirit to overcome
all odds and overcome life’s challenges. Based on true life stories, Life Story
is also about the simple things in life. Father-and-son ties, children’s love
for their parents... and the power of love among family members.

Every week, a different individual's story is told. There's Kelvin
Tan Wei Lian, who became Singapore’s first Project Superstar in an inspirational
busker-to-star transformation. There's Lim Ah Lee, an amputee with leprosy.
Abandoned by his mother at just ten years of age, he later became a fine arts
artist. There's Julie and David, a couple who were unable to have sex and have a
baby for many years before a happy miracle arised. There's Abigail Chay, who
bravely endured criticism to listen to her inner voice and become a woman.

Be touched. Be inspired.

(this is an adaptation of the above series it is purely fictional, and
we applaud the remarkable souls above mentioned and really admire their
perseverance)



Episode 6929 Michael Shen Xuan Rong

Michael Shen, who became Singapore’s first 7-inch idol in an inspirational bus(t Loo)ker-to-star transformation.

Our story begins like most other stories, with an “F”, For FiretrUCK, no really fertilization, without which many of our world leaders would not be present currently, with the exception of Anakin skywalker who was immaculately conceived by the force.

The sperm donor in this case was assumed to be mr shen and the egg was donated by mrs shen, hopefully. And thus on the 32nd of September, Michael Shen was born. Michael was born with many disabilities, at the tender age of 2 he lost 7 out of 12 toes to a paper cutting incident. 2 years later he was diagnosed with ED, and at the age of 5 he had lost the ability to use both eyes, because of a minor incident where he had apparently peeped and ogled at several passing women and made suggestive eye gestures, the woman being sympathetic with the 5 year old decided not to report the incident to the police but instead gave sweet little Michael 2 lolly pops which they shoved into his eyes hence causing blindness, as sweet as it may have been

At the age of 8, Michael was misfortunate enough to try cookies cooked by a culinary expert, or so she was perceived, named stephanie Saw, as a result his voice changed going higher, and higher and eventually ultra sound and was declared mute

One year later Michael went deaf, because he came into contact with a young lady, named april cheah who’s mouth runs on nuclear power and moves faster than a Ferrari on the autobahn and a particle accelerator put together, the constant banter and gibberish nearly drove Michael insane and gay, but fortunately before it could he went deaf

Michael was enrolled in the Singapore School for disabled Singaporeans where he was declared to be a mute, whether this was due to his past 7 years of perpetual stoning one can only wonder. At this school Michael rose and defied all odds, he regained the use of his eyes one year into schooling when his friend vividly described to him a blue-rated R21 film which jilted and shocked Michael’s senses, releasing a rush of blood testosterone and a white fluid to the head reattaching his retina and filling his eyes with more virteous humor, (virtually humourous) and he could see, to his pleasure and delight. He regained the use of speech two years into schooling when playing soccer, against his other blind classmates (he eventually scored the winning goal 20 mins into extra time) during the match he slipped on a banana peel and to his shock and delight he swore a 2000 word essay worth of profanities, and so michael could speak once again.

It was at this school where Michael met his first love Jayne, Michael also realized his talent and potential as a guitarist, he learnt quickly and before one could say “fluke-shot” he could play a variety of monotonous tunes and could sing as well as a local celebrity whose name starts with “G” and ends with “Kwee”, who recorded the hit single "lily of the valley", it was then that he found about the annual talentine, his thirst for fame and the drive to prove others wrong led him to join the competition, put off by the lack of attention, jayne told Michael, “just because you can strum a few chords and sing damn jialat, doesn’t mean you can win a talentine” Michael was not discourage, but the discriminating judges could not get past the fact that he was a 6.9 incher.

Michael was disappointed and did not want to ever fulfil his dreams, turning to drugs pimping and illegal vcd selling, he lived the life of a loose cannon, he indeed had a loose cannon. But then it happened he caught a glimpse of a poster for the 7 inch idol, and before one knew it

THE WINNER OF 7 INCH IDOL 2006 IS…




Michael Shen! And here he is with his version of More than Words!
Please follow the link bellow and it maybe a little soft, after all he was the only disciple of the careless whisperer! Ladies and Gentleman Michael Shen, take a bow Michael!
New Music

Thursday, June 29, 2006

concluding our concluded conclusion

and thus the conclusion of the concluding episode of the conclusion of the 7-inches idol shall now be concluded.

the post, which belongs to all the other posts which will must be posted but have not been posted but will soon be posted by us posters and will post them soon, yes the post will now be posted.


the transition, which transits us in the stage of transition where we........

you get it.

*Note: before i start, i have to explain our absence. Kuns has been really busy with training for inter-school nats, where he'll own other schools in his well-endowed strokes, lets hope he'll score with a tall femme too. Shen is busy over an island off the east coast of the US, checkin out girls and.. yeah that's just it. if not for him being overseas, this post would not exist at all. ___ and me fullofbullshit were rather busy with our lives. so thus explains our one month hiatus.

fear not, we are back. so there. moving on. Welcome to 7-inches idol everybody! I'm ryan C-breast, your host for this evening. anyway. i'm terribly sorry. but even before you, yes you our audience could even see our candidates and vote, our esteemed 7-inch judges had reviewed all our candidates and found many flaws and problems that just could not deem them as 7-inch idols. thus, we had no choice but to ELIMINATE. but fear not, through our strict criteria and good eye for good 7-inchers out there, we have found him, the one and only


7-INCH IDOL

but before we can showcase our new star, we just have to show you fellow readers out there just who almost made it, and who did not.


for starters, we have Enoch Foong

Name: Enoch Foong Age: 18 this year
What made him a potential 7-inch idol?
Enoch had a beautiful voice, just lifting his vocal chords to his high falsetto lulled many people to pure bliss and peace, such that everyone settled into tranquil slumber. his voice melted the hearts of many girls and guys and if not for one little flaw, would most definitely be our 7-inch idol.

What screwed up?
for some reason, ___, one of our esteemed judges decided one day while ponning chin's and unloadin in the men's decided to whip out the.....

7-INCH IDOL MANUAL
101 ways to be one

and to his shock and horror, he found that in Page 29126, section ATP, line 505, there was a distinct criteria to be a 7-inch idol. it went like this.

to be a 7-inch idol, one must not be a MALAYSIAN, and your name must not be ENOCH FOONG.

ahh! could you imagine the chagrine on poor Enoch's face when he heard the news? he was so intent on winning that when the judges broke it to him, he broke down and broke his voice. now he will never lull us with his falsetto but will spur us with his bass tunes.

moving on, we now have jessica lian.

Name: Jessica Lian Ah Lian
Age:50+


What made her a pote
ntial 7-inch idol?
nothing. nothing. nothing. enough said.

What screwed up?
everything. everything. everything. when Kuns, another esteemed judge went to call her into the interview room for her audition, he caught her holding two things, a bio book cum math ws cum chem notes cum medea cum east,west cum chinese zuo wen cum econs tb in one hand, studying them all at one go. and a picture of a particular guy, all laminated and vandalised with ILUBJOO and mY_lAo_goNgzZz all over it in the other hand. i shall not divulge the name of the guy for bose chan kar yoen will kill me when i tell everyone that the guy in the picture was him.

ANYWAY. here comes the funny part. before she started, ___ kindly reminded her that this was an english programme and so only english songs were to be sung. amazingly, Ah Lian told us she had a song ready for us and it was GREEN DAY. satisfied,we let her sing.

AND the brilliant jessica lian sang a totally different song. we were expecting some rocker song by the band Green Day, and guess what we got?

QING TIAN BY JAY CHOU

yes, failed is she, booted out is she, twit is she.


And now we have our final lost candidate, Chrissy-poo ow

Name: Chris Ow or also know as Chrissy poo in other idol denominations
Age:16

What made him a potential 7-inch idol?
Chris Ow came from a family of Ows. the poor kid was always being laughed at, for whenever someone was prodded, smacked, tao poked, raped or just simply stepped on, and cried OW! he would run straight to the person in earnest. poor thing.

but in any case, Chrissy-poo decided that enough was enough, he would show those people who laughed at him all the time. yes he would show them by being the next 7-inch idol. yeah. he'd show them. yeah. he'd show them. yeah. he'd show them. yeah. he'd show them. yeah. he'd show them. yeah he'd show them.

What screwed up?
i think back there, you people must have already guessed what went wrong. poor Chrissy-poo suffered from an ultra rare disease that only occurred when the bases GUA was base substituted to form GAA. such a minor change could cause catastrophic results. bio sure is fun isn't it?

ahem, anyway. Chrissy poo suffered from Looper's Disease, and as it's name suggested, it tended to put him into loops. poor kid never got past the first 3 lines. he kept repeatin them over and over again. over and over again. until someone took out his batteries.





yes, there we go, the three have all failed. what to do?
simple. we show you the winner.



MICHAEL SHEN. AKA 6.9 INCHER, AKA HOMER, AKA 7-INCH IDOL

the next post shall showcase our fantastic singer.


And there we have it, 7-inch idol has concluded

****yes, i know i know, qing tian is not green day in english and its Loopus' disease. but for spoof's sake, i'm sure you readers out there won't mind right?

*** to all readers who feel offended. especially the three people. don't be. it's all in the name of fun. both bens took it well. you should take it well too.


Tuesday, June 27, 2006

IT LIVES!!!

Not since the revelation of the new tie, the birth of michael jackson, the declaration of independence or the birth of Benjamin tan Yong Qiang has the world witnessed such a shocking turn of events.

Once declared closed and shut down, an exhibit of former heights of ancient glory and failed humanity, it now once again walks the realms of man. An ancient evil so evil, that evil cannot fully describe how evil the evil is, its evil. This evil shall once again haunt, it shall once again rear its ugly head (no refrence to Kuan Meng) and shall once again reign in the darkness. It Lives! Again!

This Blog lives...

And the moment you've been waiting for is nearly here, our conclusion of
the annual 7-inch idol is about to be concluded, our panel of judges from the
"singapore 7-inches idol judges panel of judges of singapore" have wished
to express their appreciation to the die hard fans who have really entertained
them and their morbid pleasures, they once again wish to reassure
the public that the conclusion of the concluding post of the conclusion
of the 7-inches idol will be concluded sooon.

Monday, June 12, 2006

pose

this has somewhat to do with the 7-inches.
anyway, we're guest-starring people like CHERMAINE PHOON YIP MUN, and NATASHA GOH SHU HUI. lol.

so yeah, these pictures are ancient. whahhaha.
lijiang rocks :)

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we should have taken off our tops or something yeah? then it'll be more abercrombie-ish. even though we dont actually have a million dollar bod..lol.

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well, im not like very proud of these picture. but im glad that i actually know how to use photoshop :) hahah.
its like just put the words there thats all. hahah.
nvm, next time, we'll plan the shoot, and yeah, get it going on, and be PROFESSIONAL :)

anyway, im just rambling.
dont u think parr's a really cool name? :)
ahhh, im in <3 with it whahahah.

confucius says, "man with tool in woman's mouth not necessarily dentist."

Friday, June 09, 2006

twit

since this blog is like almost dead, i shall just revive it for a while...

i cant help it, but i cant believe the fact that i actually know a TWIT! omg.

introducing to youuu,
jessica lian...

a picture is worth a thousand words...
im not gonna explain...
just look and erm, enjoy. haha.

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wowww, wad a matching pair...

and so, everyones like doing their own things.
me: ridiculous amounts of trainings.
markky: homeworking? or he's always going out la haha. so hip.
theodore: geisha-ing away in japan. "these are memoirs of a geisha, a story like mine should never be told."
then start to walk on super high heels and throws the fans around. haha.

shenny: over in, germany is it?, well, sailing for some international meet.
LOTS OF LUCK TO YOU from the 7-inchers!

ah, 2 weeks left. :S :S :S how how how?! then mid years. sian ah.
thanks to sch nats, mid years for me is postponed :) :) haha. but i still have to take it anyway, no diff.

i have no life. all i do i just EXIST. how sad is that?

and btw, all of you have to watch SHE'S THE MAN! it's frigging hilarious la..
i <3 amanda bynes. still remembered that i was crazy over her in sec2 after watching her in "the amanda show" lol. how embarrasing is that??

7-inches idol...
come and audition..
we'll see who can erm, come go the furthest. :)

confucius says, "cows with no legs, are ground beef."